This is the second bit of fanfic I wrote about Mara being thrust into the world of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.  If you desire more information about the premise I use for Mara and Jackie taking part in Buffy and the Scooby Gang's adventures, reread my comments at the beginning of the first story.  This particular story is a What If tale in the sense of What If they'd been present during the events of "Passions," which I believe was the title of the episode where Angel killed Jenny Callendar.  I disagreed with her being killed, so when Jackie and Mara happened to pop into the episode at just the right time, well,.. you'll see what happens.

But first, the disclamers:  Mara McCuniff and Jackie Chiu are copyrighted characters of Traci Briery.  Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all characters in the show are copyrighted characters of Joss Whedon, Warner Brothers, 20th Century Fox and whoever else owns them.  I ain't gettin' no money off of these, folks.

Jackie and her friend Mara had agreed from the start not to tell anyone else of their unexpected adventures in television land. Lack of plausibility was a main factor in their decision. As excited as Jackie had been appearing in her favourite (so far) programme about vampires, even her own die-hard friends would have doubted her sanity.

Which had led Jackie to an unanswered question: had their visit to the show Buffy the Vampire Slayer been televised? Had anybody else seen their experience? What about those same die-hard fans of Jackie's? She had neglected to set up her VCR at home, and had missed taping it. But what of reruns, then? WOULD their own special episode make it into syndication, or be forever lost in the pages of fantasy?

And none of the above mattered to Mara. She had been through a terrible ordeal that had forced her to recant her nearly-lifelong vow of pacifism. She had not raised a hand against another in over a thousand years, and yet had become enraged enough to tear a giant insect to pieces. True, in the end she believed that her purpose had been to stop a demonic rampage by any means possible, but she had turned her back on her warrior days long before. So she had, after returning home, settled back into her domestic life as firmly as possible. Back to the life of teaching, running errands, paying taxes, helping her kids with homework, knitting, attending church, and... everything. And she was just as committed to NOT watching "that awful show" as ever. Perhaps even more so, having experienced firsthand how violent the programme was. Jackie had given up trying to convince her that there was more to it than just fight scenes with vampires. Mara was her best friend above all others, so Jackie had learned long ago that she was not one to easily change her mind about anything.

Mara was finishing up a late-night run to the supermarket. It was common of her to start the grocery-shopping after the kids were in bed, and her husband Jim was preparing for his own bedtime. The local market closed at midnight on most nights. One of the few advantages to being confined to night-time hours: one rarely met with crowds when shopping. Only the places that closed before the sun went down were problems, but that's what her very human husband was for.

She finished loading the shopping bags into the trunk of her car, then clutched at the keys while heading back to the driver's seat. Her keys somehow dropped from her hand, so she quickly snatched them back and looked up... to find that her car was no longer there. The parking lot itself, the entire market... somewhere else. Instead she was standing in what appeared to be the hallways of a school- possibly the very school where she taught night courses in British History for adults getting their high school equivalencies. But she didn't recognise this part of the school.

Jackie's favourite programme was running the opening credits in the background as she took a cigarette break in the restroom. She had tossed the latest Reader's Digest in there and was skipping the articles within for the funny stuff. The little anecdotes that other readers had sent in. For some reason she preferred the Life in Uniform section most of all, which was devoted to funny stories about the military.

Jackie wandered out of the restroom, checking to make sure the commercials were still running, and checked her fridge and cupboards for munchies. Finding nothing but cheddar cheese crackers, she decided to return and just suffer through the ads. Finally Buffy returned to the screen, but the sound was still off (Jackie had used the Mute button on the ads). She reached for the remote, then bent back up... and was no longer in her chair.

Her chair was gone, the remote was gone, her furniture, her walls... her TV! They were all gone, and replaced with a hallway. A dark one, too. Her eyes adjusted quickly to the darkness, and this place made her think of a school. Lockers lined the walls, there were posters and bulletin boards and-

"Mare?" she says, peering at the woman just at the other end of the longest part of the hallway. "Hey, Mare!"

"Jackie?" says Mara, moving towards her. "Why would you be here? Oh, no-is something wrong at home? What's going on? Is something wrong??"

"Jeez, calm down," says Jackie. "Don't ask ME why I'm here. What is this - a school or something? Is this where you teach?"

"I..." says Mara, looking around. "I'm not sure. And I can't seem to find the light switches. I wonder if we have to go to-"

"Ahhhhh!! Oh, my God!!" cries Jackie. Her face is a combination of shock, horror... and joy? "Oh... my... God!!"

"What? WHAT??" cries Mara, looking about frantically for an answer. Jackie just points at first.

"Look at that!" she says. "At the bulletin board! Sunnydale! We're at Sunnydale High!"

"Wh-wh-wh I don't understand what you mean by that," says Mara. "What are you screaming about?"

"Sunnydale!" says Jackie again. "You know--- Sun-ny-dale!" Mara obviously DOESN'T know. "We were here... a few months ago, remember? This is where Buffy goes to school!"

"Buffy??" says Mara. "Oh, you can't be serious. No, NO, we are not back in that awful show!"

"Then how do you explain our being right here in the school?"

"I'm not going to! We're dreaming all this! Or just you. Or just me! I don't know, but this can't be happening again!"

"Hey, speak for yourself, Mare," says Jackie. "If this is a dream, I can live with that, no problem!"

"But... But... Why would we be here at all?" asks Mara. "We weren't arguing over the remote this time, and you didn't say any magic words or whatnot. For goodness' sake, I was buying groceries! There's certainly nothing 'magical' about that!"

"Hey, don't look at ME," says Jackie. "I'm as clueless as you are. Unless..." she stops and ponders a moment, then shakes her head. "No," she says. "That's too weird."

"What is? Please, any idea at all is better than none."

"We're special guest stars," says Jackie.

"....Come again?" says Mara. "I don't follow you."

"It's a TV show," says Jackie. "We're special guest stars. Again." Then her face lights up. "We must've been popular with the fans!"

"I beg your pardon?"

"Well, why else would we be here?" says Jackie. "We accidentally got thrown into an episode, but the fans, or whoever, must've liked us, or we wouldn't be here again!"

"But how could we be here without... without some kind of force bringing us here?" says Mara. "Without the odd thing with the remote that somehow became a spell, or... or I don't know what!"

"What 'force' brought us here?" says Jackie. "The force of ratings, that's what! We were brought here by the power of the script. We're wanted for the show, so we're here now!"

"Oh, that's ridiculous," says Mara. "As though a writer could type out that we're here, so we're here for real."

"What if he has a magic typewriter?" asks Jackie. "Look, I'm sure we'll find out how to get back, but just like last time, we have to figure out our reason for being here. Remember? We kept trying the thing with the remote, but it didn't work until after the bad guys had been killed, and you got the TV to show your house. We didn't get here that way, so there's another way to get back this time. We just have to find the gang and get their help again."

"Oh, this is just unbelievable," mutters Mara. "This is totally unacceptable. You're asking me to accept that we're just going to start popping into a television show because 'the fans' want us to? Regardless of what we might be doing at the time in the real world?"

"Why do you keep asking me things like that?" says Jackie. "I don't know!"

"Well, YOU'RE the fan," says Mara. "You know how things work here. I don't."

Jackie rolls her eyes. "The only thing I'm pretty sure of," she says, "Is that we'll be out of here no more than an hour in 'the real world.' Last time we thought we were gone for days, but Jim hardly noticed we were gone. He thought we'd run an errand or something. And then we caught the credits of the episode we'd just been in!"

"I still don't have to like any of this," says Mara. "You can't expect me to-"

"SH!" says Jackie, and Mara looks irritated. Then she also hears the noise. Echoing footsteps of someone running through the halls of the school. The terrible accoustics make it difficult to pinpoint, but a second set of footsteps clinches the location. They look down the same hallway and see a woman run by, followed by a large man wearing a duster.

"Hey, that looks like-" mutters Jackie to herself, then feels a rush of air and sees a blur race down the hallway. "Mare, wait!" she cries out, but has no choice now but to follow. She'll find out which one Mara intercepted once she turns the corner. Half a second later, she races by Mara and the man, who have both stopped, and continues on after the woman. She stops and makes herself like a wall, not budging an inch when the woman slams into her.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry," says Jackie. The woman is too panicked to speak, but wastes no time trying to get around her. "Hey, wait, you're gonna be okay, just... Whoa! You're Jenny Callender, right?"

"Let me go!" says Jenny. "He's trying to kill me! Get away from me!"

"Don't worry, my friend stopped the guy," says Jackie. "Who's trying to kill you?"

"He'll kill all of us!" she says. "Let me go!"

Jackie backs off and lets Jenny rush past her, then brings her focus on rejoining Mara. She creeps around the corner and sees that Mara is keeping herself in front of the man who'd been after Jenny. He moves cagily, like a starving tiger being taunted with a slab of raw meat just out of reach. "Oh, no," whispers Jackie to herself, and wastes no time zipping to Mara's aid.

"Angel, do you remember me or not?" Mara is saying. "I know it's been a while, but- oh! Jackie! You remember her, don't you? My friend Jackie?"

"Ah-hah-hah," says Jackie nervously. "Mare, we need to talk."

"Yeah, 'Mare,' why don't you go talk to your friend. I'm busy."

"But that woman... Jackie, did you find her? What happened?"

"There's REALLY something you should know, Mare," says Jackie, standing just behind Angel and nodding her head to indicate that he is the subject.

"She was trying to hurt Buffy," says Angel. "That woman you let get away was trying to hurt Buffy, and now you've stopped me, too!"

"What? How?" says Mara, concerned.

"Enough of this," says Jackie, pushing her way up to face off with Angel. He towered over her by over a foot, but Jackie won't back down. "Angel, whatever you meant to do with Jenny, forget it. Why don't you crawl back to Spike and Dru and plot the end of the world some other way?"

"Jackie!"

"This is my call, Mare!" says Jackie, not budging her gaze from Angel. "I know you remember us. And you know damn well what SHE'S capable of, so beat it."

Angel doesn't move.

"NOW," says Jackie. He does move, but slowly at first, making sure to keep his eye on both of them as he turns. Then he breaks into a trot and runs back the way he came. Mara is dumbfounded.

"I don't understand why you did that," she says.

"Because you're not watching the show, remember?" says Jackie. "We have to find Jenny."

*  *  *

"Evil??" says Mara. "What do you mean, he's evil?"

Jenny takes another shaky sip from the tea that Giles has poured for her. They both sit on the living room sofa at his house. Mara and Jackie, having been allowed to enter his place, sit in separate easy chairs. Mara is leaning forward as she speaks.

Giles removes his glasses and rubs his eyes. "Um..." he says, "The, uh... the curse that Angel had been under... has been broken. The curse that had restored his soul to him has been broken, and his soul returned to the ether. Now only a demon is inside of him. There is nothing left of the Angel that we'd come to know."

"And it's my fault," says Jenny quietly.

"You chose loyalty to your family over loyalty to your friends," says Giles. 'Under normal circumstances, that is as it should be."

"I'm never going to be forgiven for what I've done," says Jenny. "But I've been trying to make up for it by recreating the original curse. And I'd finally managed to translate it, and then... Angel..."

"It's all right, Jenny," whispers Giles, putting an arm around her. "It was your good fortune that Mara and Jackie came upon you and Angel when they did. And I-we are greatly in your debt for that. Thank you."

"Oh, we could have done no less," says Mara. "But-forgive me if I'm intruding on this difficult moment, but may I ask what caused this.. reversal? Did you break the curse, Jenny? Remember, I don't watch--- erm, I-I don't know Sunnydale legend that well."

"A-actually..."

"Don't worry, Giles," says Jackie. "I can fill her in on details. We should be leaving you two alone. But... before we go, you wouldn't happen to know a place where we can crash during the daytime? I have a feeling Angel won't be offering his place again."

"No, that would seem to be a certainty," says Giles. "Well... I do happen to have an office that has no windows. I've used it as a darkroom before. I'm afraid that cushions and sleeping bags won't be terribly comfortable, but-"

"We accept," says Jackie.

"Thank you," says Mara. "Thank you very much."

"Er... unless.. Jenny, did you have any objections?" asks Giles. She looks surprised.

"You're asking ME?" she says. "Rupert, this is your place. These are your friends."

"Well, yes, but I was assuming that you would also be staying here," he says. "For reasons of safety, of course. We've no reason to think Angel wouldn't try again if you were alone in your apartment."

"Strictly for reasons of safety, hm?" she asks, a slight smile forming. He looks around at the others, one to the other, his face slightly redder than usual.

"Er, yes," he says. "I've never invited Angel in myself, and um... well, Mara and Jackie here are the most powerful vampires I've ever seen, and-"

"WHAT?" cries Jenny, standing up and almost dropping her tea. Giles also stands up and attempts to console her.

"No no no no!" he says. "It's all right. They've been most helpful. And they DID save your life, and-"

"Did my family curse you, too?" she says, trying to get some distance from them, but Giles holds onto her gently, but firmly. "Or was this a trick to get invited inside?"

"We're not like... most vampires you know," says Jackie. "We're the good guys!"

"Rupert, perhaps if you could hand me a crucifix?" says Mara quietly, almost like a whisper. "Even holy water, if you have it."

"Um, yes, um..." says Giles, and needs only to pull down a small wooden cross that is hanging on his wall. He brings it to Mara, who takes it from him and holds it up to Jenny. She switches it from hand to hand, showing no marks or signs of pain to her as she does so, until finally bringing it up to her lips and kissing it.

"Yes, it's true," says Mara. "I AM a vampire. And a teacher, a mother and a wife. And a Christian."

"That's impossible."

"Not where we come from," says Jackie.

"It would take a long time to explain," says Giles. "Jenny, perhaps you'd like to get some rest instead? Would you care for some more tea?"

Jenny slumps back onto the couch with a loud sigh, then sits in silence for a bit. "Thanks," she says, "But no thanks. Maybe a cold shower instead."

*  *  *

After Giles and Jenny had retired for the night, Jackie had taken it upon herself to talk Mara into going back to the school and looking for Jenny's disk. She had mentioned saving her work onto a disk before Angel's arrival, and while he had made a bonfire of her CPU and monitor, she did not remember the disk itself being destroyed. After all, for them the night had just begun, so there would be plenty of time to look for the disk, then return back to Giles' for the day.

Anything that would speed up the return home suits Mara just fine, so she agrees to the plan. The two of them are soon walking the streets of Sunnydale in search of the high school, trusting, as Jackie puts it, "the blessings of the writers to guide us there." But real estate on a hellmouth is not without its drawbacks. Soon enough some dark and imposing figures begin emerging from the bushes and trees. Two in front, two on each side, and two behind them to form a nice circle. Mara sighs to herself.

"Evening, ladies," says one of the vampires in front of them. "Out for a stroll, are we?"

Mara sighs again and shuts her eyes. "Oh, we do NOT have time for this," she mutters to herself.

"Oh, crap," whispers Jackie.

"Gentlemen," says Mara, "For your own safety, please continue on and let us be on our way."

Jackie shakes her head, knowing full well this would only make them-

The vampires erupted into guffaws of laughter. Mara's eyes narrow.

"'Gentlemen,' she says," says the same vampire. "Well, it's nice to know we can still get entertainment with our meals."

"Wrong," says Mara, and grabs Jackie by the arm and holds on tight. Jackie is not expecting this, but does not resist, especially not after a wave of pure force smashes into her, and then past her. Only Mara's grip keeps her from being thrown off into the distance. Nothing keeps the others in their place, though, and all eight vampires are pushed up and into the air, each landing some 10-odd meters from their original positions. Some land in bushes, some smashing into trash cans laid out for the morning, some slam into walls... None are spared the concussive force of her blast.

"Jesus, you can do that, too??" cries Jackie in surprise and shock.

"Never mind that," says Mara. "Let's get out of here quickly. And don't use Jesus' name in vain."

"Uhhh, sure," says Jackie just before zipping away to follow her friend.

*  *  *

"Ahhh, poor Angelus," says Spike from his wheelchair. "Had his heart set on taking down The Slayer piece by piece, then chats with old friends instead."

"It's true," says Angelus. "In fact, they'll be stopping by later say hello. But oh... you won't be able to rise to the occasion, will you?"

"They must have rattled you more than you thought," says Spike. "That was your weakest one yet. So tell me - you'd kill the gypsy girl, then you'd expect the others to... what, do nothing about it?"

"One plan at a time, roller boy," says Angelus. "One move at a time. Besides, we can't afford to have Puppy Boy making a comeback, can we?" He holds up a computer diskette.

"Brought back a copy of Quake II, have we?" says Spike.

"Nope," says Angelus. "I thought about it, then figured, you know, those two must be seeing to Callender's safety. So I poked around some more, and found-" he kisses the diskette- "This. Dru, would you like to say goodbye to Puppy Boy?"

"But I loyk puppies."

"Well, this one's got to be put down," he says, and tosses the diskette into the fireplace, where a fire already blazes.

"I see," says Spike. "So that must be that little gypsy curse that brought you oh so much pain."

"Not bad, Big Wheel," says Angelus. "I think you should stay in the chair. All that blood is being forced into your brain, making you smarter than any of us."

"Spoyyyk... Annnngelus," says Dru, forcing herself between them. She wraps her arms around Angelus, though. "Fight the curse, or it'll alllll become worse," she says, letting her head fall back until she sees Spike again. She smiles; he does not.

"That's the plan, babycakes," says Angelus, kissing her hand. This causes Spike to shove forward with his wheelchair, hitting Angelus in the leg. He snarls again and swipes at Spike, but is again stopped by Dru.

"I don't suppose either of you have heard of backup copies?" says Spike. "Printouts? That sort of thing?"

"No printouts," says Angelus, letting Dru play with his hair. "No copies. No computer. It's just one big melted paperweight. Besides, I've got it extra covered. Found a wannabe ready and willing to follow her."

"Oh, hired a human to do the job, have we?" says Spike. "Oh, THAT'LL work."

"Well, Spike, I was planning on just aiming you at the gypsy girl and hoping your chair would crash into her, but Dru talked me out of it. Barely."

"Oh, Angelus, such a tease!" says Dru. "Innit he a tease, Spoyk?"

"Yeah," says Spike. "A real gag man."

Angelus takes Dru and leads her from the room, leaving Spike alone again to brood.

*  *  *

Jenny had been unsuccessful at preventing school-hired workmen to pick through the unholy mess that had been her CPU, monitor, and other hardware. Willow, books in hand and on one of those longer-than-at-a-REAL-school, between-class breaks, startles Jenny with a rap at the window. She is about to shoo Willow, then reconsiders.

"Shut the door behind you," says Jenny. "Sorry, but circumstances being what they are, no computer classes today."

"Oh, I know that," says Willow. "The word is that your computer was trashed. Giles won't say anything. Will YOU say anything?"

Jenny lets out a long sigh. "Sure," she says. "But please help me look for a disk while we talk."

"Um, okay," says Willow, setting down her books. "Sure! Is it labeled?"

"No, I didn't have time to," says Jenny from underneath her desk. She then explains, as calmly as she can, what had happened last night. "If not for those two women, Jackie and uh... uh..."

"Mara?"

"Right, those two," says Jenny, "Angel would've killed me for sure."

"Well, now I'm really mad at Giles," says Willow. "He didn't tell me they were back, either. I like them, even if they are a bit strange."

"Yes, well, Rupert hasn't been very talkative lately," says Jenny. "Willow... do you think Buffy knows what I'm trying to do?"

"I don't know," says Willow. "Do you want me to tell her?"

"No. No, I suppose it doesn't matter. At this point, my performing the curse again might set things right, but... Willow, don't tell a SOUL what I'm going to tell you."

"Oh... your soul is safe with me," says Willow. "I mean, secrets and stuff. I can do secrets."

"If I succeed, and Angel is cursed again, I'm thinking of leaving Sunnydale," says Jenny.

"Oh, no!"

"The wounds are too deep," says Jenny. "I betrayed you all, Willow. My friends. And now a monster lives again."

"Oh... well... I don't think it's completely your fault," says Willow. "I mean, you just didn't say what would break the curse. It was Buffy and Angel that did the actual.. um, curse-breaking. And then he wouldn't have killed my fish, or... Oh, she'd kill me if she knew I said that. You won't tell her, will you? Please don't tell her!"

Jenny smiles. "Your soul is safe with me," she says. "And I appreciate what you said. But it's going to take a long time for these wounds to heal. I don't know if- DAMMIT!" she cries suddenly. "Where the HELL is it?"

"You mean the disk?" says Willow. "I've been trying to find it, honest I have!"

"They must've taken it," says Jenny. "Angel must've gotten it. Mara and Jackie said they looked for it, too, but didn't find it. Angel must've come back here and found it. DAMMIT!"

"Do you want me to keep looking?"

"No," says Jenny. "You should get to your next class. I have to tell Rupert. Wait... Willow... Maybe you can help, but later."

"Sure! Whatever will make Angel a good guy again!"

"That disk had my only copy of the curse's translation," says Jenny. "I can get the original curse, and the translation program, and run it again, but all that will take time. Would you be able to help me with that?"

"Sure!" says Willow. "Old Can't Say No Willow at your service!"

*  *  *

The Scooby Gang is in the library, joined by Jenny, Jackie and Mara. The others are pretty much in the centre of the room, either seated at the main study table or leaning against bookshelves or the checkout counter. Only Buffy sits apart from the others. She leans against the doorway to Giles' office, staring at nothing. The others confer on what needs to be done in order to relocate the curse while Jackie decides to cheer up the Slayer.

"Hey," she says quietly to Buffy. Buffy only glances her way.

"How're things going?" says Jackie. Buffy just shrugs.

"Yeah," says Jackie. "Same with me. Um," she says, clearing her throat, "I know it won't exactly change things, but I'm very, very sorry about what happened. With Angel, I mean. It was like-just out of nowhere, and-"

"Yeah, I'm sure that 'scene' was very entertaining for you," says Buffy. "And then I'll bet a toothpaste commercial followed, but this is my life, okay? This actually happened to me, all right?"

"Buffy, are you all right?" Giles asks, looking away from his studies.

"Do I look all right?" she says. "I've lost Angel! It's her fault, and you're all sitting in here like nothing ever happened! And then... these two freaks interfere with what he should've finished!"

"My God, Buffy, you can't possibly mean that," he says, knowing, without having to look, that Jenny is visibly shaken. "Y-you most definitely owe Miss Callender an apology."

"Oh, I 'owe' her something, all right," she says, and pushes past Jackie to storm for the door. "Call me if there any demons to kill!" she yells on the way out. All present are in shock, none more so than Mara.

"What a horrible thing to say!" she says. "She would've had Angel-? No, I won't even continue that thought. Jackie, you said nothing to her to warrant such a thing."

"You heard them from there?" asks Xander.

"We have good hearing," says Jackie. "Well, our second appearance and we're already on Buffy's list."

"What list?" asks Mara.

"Which list do you think?"

"Jenny, I..." says Giles. "I-I must apologise for what Buffy said. She was speaking out of anger, and... you know she couldn't possibly have meant that."

"For now, she did," says Jenny. "So... do we want to keep up the search now, or call it a night?"

"I can keep looking," says Willow, in full Internet search mode.

"I have a question," says Xander. "Is there a reason we're not trying to find ways to kill him instead?"

"Xander, please, we..." says Giles. "If there's a chance to..."

"To what?" says Xander. "To reboot the guy so he can crash again? If you'll forgive the computer geek speak."

"Oh," says Willow. "I thought that was pretty, um... clever."

"Thanks. So once again, I'm alone in this, right? We all sit here looking for a 'cure' while Psycho Boy is probably out there plotting to destroy the world?"

"Xander," says Giles. "We happen to be committed to this. Jenny had discovered the curse and translated it already. It's only a matter of time - less than before - to retrieve the information again and retranslate it. Now if you're not willing to help, then there's no need for you to remain here. Thank you."

"I see," says Xander. "What about you two? Or is Angel good for the 'ratings' right now?"

"Um..." says Jackie, a bit uncomfortable. "Ordinarily, I'd be... um..."

"What?" says Xander. "Sitting back in the easy chair in your living room, watching the show? Nothing like a good bad guy, huh?"

"Xander!" says Giles. "Now I've already asked you once before! If you cannot offer any assistance, then please leave!"

"Fine," says Xander, standing up. "I'll just go get some donuts and wait until I can say 'I told you so.'"

"Yes, you do that," says Giles, not looking up from his work.

"Xander," says Jackie as he turns to leave. He pauses. "Do you want an escort?" she asks. "It IS dark outside." He seems to consider her offer.

"No, you two can stay and get more involved in the plot," he says. "Enjoy the show."

Mara looks chastened, but Jackie waits for him to be just leaving the library before chasing after him. She zips in front of him, which startles him. "Oh! I'm sorry," she says. "You okay?"

"Sure," he says. "Worse things have happened to me than vampires making like The Flash on me."

"Um... look, I'm sorry about the last time I was here, going on about TV and all that," she says. "As far as I'm concerned now, this is real. All of it. But yeah, I do wish I knew why we're here. Look at this from our viewpoint. We're trying to live OUR lives, too, and now, for whatever reason, we're being yanked away and dropped into the middle of all this. Without any warning. Jumping from one world, with its own set of rules, to a totally different one. And we don't have any more idea what's going to happen than you do. We don't know if they're gonna succeed or fail in there. Personally, I hope they DO succeed. Angel means everything to Buffy, as much as you hate that."

"Don't make this into a jealousy thing," says Xander. "He's been a timebomb from day one, and I'm the only one who seems to get that."

"Oh, I picked up on that, too," says Jackie. "But watching them, I always hoped nothing would ruin that. Okay, so YOU were the one who was right. But maybe this is a temporary thing. You're not gonna stop them from trying, or Buffy from... well, obsessing about him. But let's put it this way: if they blow it, and Buffy has to face him down once and for all, and I'm here, I'll help her do it. That's a promise."

"You don't say," says Xander.

"I DO say," she says. "Mare couldn't do it, but I could. Now... you SURE you don't want an escort?"

*  *  *

"So Xander's at home, then?" asks Giles shortly after Jackie and Mara have arrived back at the library.

"After getting his donuts, yeah, we got him safely home," says Jackie.

"Did you happen to see Buffy while outside?"

"No," says Mara. "Was she expected back?"

"Um... not exactly," says Giles. "I just, um... No, of course she's all right. The Slayer can very well take care of herself."

"You don't want us to look for her?" offers Mara.

"There should be no need to," says Giles.

"As you wish," says Mara. "On the other hand, true, I'd like to think that escorting people isn't our real purpose this time around," says Mara.

"Well, heck, we saved Miss Callender, didn't we?" says Jackie.

"And for that, I am eternally grateful," says Jenny. "If there's any way I can repay you-"

"Just getting Angel back into shape is good enough for us," says Jackie.

"I'm not sure if that's something we could really help with, though," says Mara. "You all seem to have your tasks set out for you. And I'd REALLY like to get home. The trouble is, we still don't know how to do that."

"We could try the remote trick again," says Jackie. "Giles, do you have a remote for your TV?"

"Er, um... I'm afraid not," he says. "My television predates the use of remotes."

"Rumour has it, its last owner was Fred Flinstone," says a voice from the library's entrance. All turn to look and see Xander coming towards them, a bag of donuts in his hand. He reaches the table, then sets down the bag.

"Hi, guys," says Xander, setting his bag down onto the table. "Donuts. I.. thought you might want something sugary to boost your levels and keep you up all night. Doing that research thing always puts ME out in a few minutes."

"I see," says Giles. "Um... thank you, Xander."

"Hi, Xander!" says Willow, her face brightening.

"So!" says Xander. "Any progress on that making Angel not an inhuman monster thing?"

"Xander, if you haven't changed your mind about-" says Giles, and Xander stops him in midsentence.

"I AM here to help," he says. "But you know me... Just can't quite exorcise all the snidiness in me."

"That's snideness," says Mara. "There's no such word as snidiness."

"I don't believe that snideness is, either," says Giles.

"Really? Are you sure?"

"Not entirely, but it seems a bit awkward of a word."

"Have you a dictionary, then?" asks Mara. "Now I'm curious."

"Yes, there in the Reference section..."

Willow giggles. "It's like listening to two Giles!"

"What is?" say Mara and Giles simultaneously.

"Mare!" says Jackie as her friend starts thumbing through an Oxford English. "You can look up words later! We need to get home, remember?"

"Wha-? Oh!" says Mara, hurrying back. "I'm so sorry. I can't believe I let myself get distracted. Yes! How will we be getting home?"

"Perhaps it would help to reconstruct the events that brought you here," says Giles.

"We told you," says Jackie, "There were no real 'events' to speak of. We weren't even together this time. I was at home, and Mare... uh..."

"Shopping," says Mara. "At the grocery store."

"Shopping, and then... we were here!"

"No television, no magical remotes," says Mara. "I wasn't even thinking of this.. place.. this time."

"I was," says Jackie. "That is, I was watching it. You. You guys."

"I'm sorry, this is too strange for me," says Jenny. "I believe that vampires exist, and demons, and that there are Slayers, and Watchers, and even gypsy curses. But-that we're not real at all? That we're just characters in a TV show?"

"We've been through all this before," says Jackie. "I'm trying not to bring it up at all, but sometimes we kinda have to. But people are gonna get bored hearing it hashed over and over."

"People? What people?"

No one answers Jenny's question, leaving her even more frustrated. Not a good time to explain that the viewers... the fans... are "the people."

"You know, I just thought of this," says Jackie, then ponders some more. "No, never mind," she says. "No, that's not a good idea."

"What?" asks Mara.

"Really; never mind."

"Jackie, any idea is better than none," says Giles.

"Oh, I don't know," says Willow. "I mean, look at some of the ideas Cordelia's come up with!"

"Okay, fine, but it won't work," says Jackie. "I was thinking that.. well, ASSUMING only that you can't find and translate the curse again, that maybe Mare and I could bring Angel into... our world."

"Goodness, why would we want to do that?" says Mara. "Bring someone like him into our world? I think not."

"We aren't!" says Jackie. "Hey, YOU'RE the one who insisted on hearing it. I already said it wouldn't work. He wouldn't revert any more than we did here."

"Er... sorry, revert how, exactly?" says Giles.

"Well, my bad idea was that, if Angel were brought to our world, where vampires don't lose their souls, his own might... I dunno, return to him or something. See? Dumb idea."

"N...not necessarily," says Giles. "Why don't you think this would work?"

"Well, think about it," says Jackie. "We came here, where vamps are a bunch of soulless demons, and we haven't 'gone bad' or anything like that. Plus we haven't dropped down to being like the wimpy guys that you fight. So Angel-"

"Wimpy?" says Xander. "Did you just say wimpy?"

"Uh... uh..." says Jackie. She looks to Mara, who just rolls her eyes and sighs.

"Our vampires are NOT wimpy," protests Willow. "Well... maybe to someone like Buffy, they are, but they give US a hard time."

"I didn't mean WIMPY, exactly," says Jackie. "I meant-"

"You meant wimpy," says Xander.

"Ohhhhhh," groans Jackie.

"All this levity aside," says Mara, "I really.. really... REALLY.. think we need to find a way to get home."

*  *  *

It has been a few days yet since Jackie and Mara have made it home. Jackie had attempted to explain their sudden departure from Sunnydale by blaming Mara. Again. She was convinced that Mara was not as much in control of her substantial power as she'd thought. Mara summarily rejected this, wishing only to get home to her loving family and forgetting the whole thing forevermore, but Jackie could not and would not. It is always in the back of her mind now that Mara can literally WILL them in or out of Sunnydale. Or will them out, anyway. As for willing them IN, that might require a different explanation. Mara has yet to change her opinion of Buffy the Vampire Slayer (the programme, not Buffy herself). It is still "that awful show."

Nevertheless, Jackie, struggling as she is to again keep their adventures a secret, makes as much effort to return to normal as her companion. She returned to her work as a waitress at a busy Los Angeles restaurant (not to mention her side income as a photographer), and pretended that she had never met anyone even remotely involved with Sunnydale, Watchers, or Slayers.

Sick coworkers are always a pain, since this means taking on more tables. Her boss split three sections between two of his servers. The advantage to this, of course, was more tips. But Jackie is fleet of foot, has an uncanny knack for balancing plates, and intrigues those coworkers that notice just how many dishes she can carry without any strain. She downplays this all, of course. "Zipping" from table to table faster than the eye can follow would be a little TOO impressive in her situation.

"Hi! I'm Jackie, and I'll be your server tonight," she says to table after table. "Our specials tonight are- Buffy??"

Three women sit at this table. Buffy, an older woman who appears familiar to Jackie, but she cannot place the face, and a third girl about Buffy's age, but totally unknown to her. Buffy smiles awkwardly.

"Um, no," she says. "But I play someone named Buffy at times."

<Oh, she's joking.... Doesn't she recognise me? Wait... She CAN'T be joking. We're not in Sunnydale... Are we? No way, this IS L.A. It has to be L.A., or I wouldn't be working here ton->

"Oh!" says Jackie, who would be turning red if she could. "I'm very sorry, um.. um, Ms. Gellar. I'm not normally one of those people that thinks someone is the character they play. It's just there was a reason for my--- Never mind; um! Our specials tonight are Grilled Swordfish with..."

*  *  *

It is all that Jackie can do to keep from hyperventilating throughout the evening. Outwardly, she appears calm, collect, the true Angelino in the presence of Celebrity. After all, the stars are out every day and night in L.A. - in clubs, in restaurants, at video stores, even the supermarket sometimes. It is the culture of the native to ignore them all, or at least, not treat them any differently than any stranger. But hers is a unique experience. Jackie has met and fought beside the very alter ego of the actress she now serves a veggie burger and salad to. And she's the absolute last person to ever explain this to! "Um, hi, you only know me as your server, but I'm in reality a vampire, and my friend - also a vampire - and I have jumped twice into your TV show, and..." No, no choice tonight but to offer quick and friendly service and no "bonding."

The extra tables she has tonight pass close to the bar. Jackie has not given it even a brief glance tonight, until now. She spots, out of the corner of her eye, a large man who could have been there all night or just arrived. He has a glass of water in front of him, but does not seem to have drunk any of it. Jackie then does a double take, and almost shrieks with delight. David Boreanaz! "Angel" himself, sitting at a bar in her restaurant on the same night as Sarah Michelle Gellar stops in, too! A fantasy forms in her head in a split-second that "her" restaurant will become the new hangout for the whole cast. She imagines getting used to serving Seth and Nick and Alyson, even becoming their favourite server thanks to her fabulous service, and-

Get... a... grip, girl!!! This is just a fluke!! Now get back to your tables!!!

Fortunately none of Jackie's customers notice any break in her service, since she is, after all, the fastest one in the restaurant. And so she is able to steal further glances at Mr. Boreanaz. Ohhhh, to be the bartender, too... And he's even wearing that duster that he wears on the show! And those boots and...!

Jackie stops en route to one of the tables' "checkups" ("How is everything?"), then watches David. Closely. She is convinced that he is not aware of her gaze, and so she makes a note of everything she can. The clothing he wears. His movements. His expressions. The fact that he keeps watching Sarah with great intensity from across the room. Jackie looks over at that table. The women there seem quite oblivious to his attentions. If not, Sarah would surely have gone to her friend and asked him to join them. They're good friends off the set, too, after all. She allows herself another look at David, trying to see in the fluctuating light what "colour" he is. Is his aura light blue... or purple? Mara was always so much better at reading them than she. Mara was so sensitive to these things. And Jackie was still young, anyway. But surely she could beat Angel on her-

What the hell are you thinking, girl?? That's not Angel! The actor is here, not the vampire! Back to your tables now!

She continues her work, and, unable to convince Sarah and Company to partake of any desserts, they pay their bill and prepare to leave. Jackie successfully resists the urge to ask for her autograph, but does offer her usual friendly good-byes to them. Ah, if only she could show her most prized possession to Sarah - an autograph from BUFFY, from her first trip to Sunnydale. "Love, Buffy Summers. Please get help" she'd written, but the words didn't matter.

They leave, and Jackie catches a glimpse of David Boreanaz. Instead of leaving his seat at the bar and going to surprise his friend, he turns away and hunkers down as they pass by in the back of the restaurant. He seems to be waiting for them to exit completely. In fact, he does just this after they've left the restaurant. Jackie watches him leave, wondering if perhaps this is the sort of thing he does all the time with his pal off-set. Play Hide and Seek?

David passes into a less well-lit area, allowing Jackie a full view of his aura. FINALLY she can see his aura, as if she really needs to at all, and sees that its colour is

She almost knocks over her coworker Sandi on the way to the hallway where the restrooms are. The restaurant's payphones are there. She fumbles for change while trying to keep watching David, who is almost out the door himself. Her pockets full of plenty of change, she starts pumping in coins, not caring how much extra she's dumping in for her call.

"Hello?"

"Mare! It's Jackie! You have to come to my work! Now! I'm serious!"

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Please, Mare! I don't have time to explain anything! Just please-get to McGinty's on... on Sunset as soon as you can! PLEASE! I have to go now!"

"Ja-!"

She hangs up, then looks about frantically. David has already left the restaurant. She races to the kitchen, struggling to keep from "zipping" in, and makes it to her manager's office. The door is ajar. He is there, finishing up some business.

"Ron!" says Jackie. "Ron, I'm sorry to bug you."

"That's all right," says Ron. "What's up?"

"I need to take my break right now."

Ron looks at tonight's schedule tacked up on a wall. He looks at his watch. "Well, sorry, but you're not scheduled for another... looks like twenty minutes."

She waits for him to turn his attention back to her. She hates resorting to his sort of thing; she truly does, but there is more at stake than a late salad or cup of coffee. She locks gazes with him and concentrates just long enough to... get his attention.

"Ron..." she says. "I really.... need... a break now."

*  *  *

Sarah, her mother, and her friend Ashley are chatting as they make their way to their car near the rear of the parking lot. The lamp closest to the car happens to be burned out, but light is not so scarce as to seem intimidating.

"Buffy," calls a voice from the shadows as she walks by. Ordinarily she would ignore this; after all, her name is NOT Buffy, but the voice sounds familiar. She stops and looks, then sees a large figure standing in darkness.

"How's it going?" says the man. She peers into the darkness, now a little nervous. Her mother and friend, aware that she has stopped, also stop and turn to look back.

"Who is that?" says Sarah. "Please come out into the light."

"Sure," says the man, and steps forward. Her worried look is replaced by relief and even joy. As David gets closer, she smiles.

"David!" she cries. She rushes to him and gives him a big hug. "God, don't scare me like that! Are you here to have dinner?"

"Yeah," he says, not returning her hug. "I'm here to grab a bite."

"Oh, man, we just ate there, too," says Sarah. "We'd stick around and hang with you, but it's been a long day."

"Hello, David!" say Sarah's mother and friend in overlapping voices. He makes a quick move of his head in acknowledgement. "How have you been lately?"

"Not bad," says David. "I'm a little hungry, though."

"I recommend the veggie burger," says Sarah. "They actually have juicy patties! Veggie patties are almost always dry and hard, even in nice restaurants. But that one was great."

"Thanks, but I'm in the mood for something a little bit juicier," says David. The other women, meanwhile, have been moving closer to them. They are all smiles, especially Ashley, who, although friends with the star of the show, never tires of bumping into this particular costar.

"Well, don't let us keep you," says Sarah, giving him a playful swat on his chest. "Were you there late tonight? You look like you just came from the set."

"Actually, I haven't been to the set," he says. "I've been following you three all night tonight." Sarah smiles, then loses the smile and cocks an eyebrow instead.

"Uhh..." she says, not quite sure how to respond. "Right! Sure you did!"

"That's exactly right," he says. "Now that you're all here, and together... I get to kill you."

"Uh... huh?"

David's hand shoots out like a cobra's and grabs Ashley by the throat. She yelps in shock, but then can make no other sound thanks to his tight grip squeezing her windpipe. Her eyes go wide, and she grabs his arm and pulls, but David's grip is no looser than before. Sarah and her mother look on in disbelieving shock to start, until Sarah finally rushes in to try to peel away his hand from her friend's neck.

"What the hell are you doing??" she screams. "David, knock it off!!"

"David" turns slowly to look at her, a half-smile creeping onto his face. Sarah looks up to see his features, now human, suddenly twist into the familiar "vamp" look from her own show. Not after hours of makeup and post-production work on computers to "morph" the human look into the vampire look, but in half a second. Before her eyes.

She gasps in surpirse, but does not let go of his arm, so he pushes her away effortlessly with his free hand. Sarah stumbles backwards for a while before falling into her mother, knocking them both to the ground.

"Angelus! Drop the girl! NOW!"

The voice is unfamiliar to everyone, save to Angelus himself, who does not drop his red-faced, wheezing victim, but does turn to face his new adversary. Jackie, grim-faced, steps forward from the dim light of McGinty's back door.

"I'm not bluffing, Angelus," she says. "Let her go or there'll be hell to pay."

"Oh, I'm not bluffing, either," he says, giving Ashley a slight shake. She whimpers in pain and fear. Angelus has been holding her off the ground so far; the only thing keeping her neck from stretching is the deathgrip she keeps on his arm. Sarah and her mother, meanwhile, have climbed back onto their feet.

"Don't," says Jackie. "You know I can take you."

"Can you, now?" he says. "Your ditzy British friend - yeah, I can believe that, but you?" He shakes his head. "Not gonna happen. Hey, keep on coming towards me. I'll just... maybe snap her neck, huh?"

"What... is going ON here?" says Sarah, her eyes welling with tears, her voice shaking. "David... PLEASE. Why are you doing this?"

"That's not David... Boreanaz," says Jackie, hesitating in order to remember just how to pronounce that name of his. "Trust me on this."

"And who the hell are you?" says Sarah. "Weren't you our waitress??"

"This is your Last Warning, Angelus!" says Jackie. "Set her down NOW, or I'm taking you down!"

"You're threatening him? ExCUSE me-!"

Jackie is certain that Angelus will give no warning, but will simply snap the girl's neck. She makes a decision, and then acts. Faster than anyone's eyes can follow, including Angelus', she is suddenly behind him, and twists her hand from Ashley's throat, who then drops to the ground, gasping and coughing. Sarah and her mother waste no time rushing to her aid and pulling her from the scene. Jackie, meanwhile, keeps her attention on Angelus and continues twisting his arm to force it behind his back. He stands on his toes from the pain, but struggles to get free. His strength takes Jackie a bit by surprise, but her grip is still good.

"Sarah..." he chokes, "Call the police... Call someone... This girl is hurting me!"

"This isn't your friend David!" shouts Jackie. "Look at him! This isn't makeup! It's his real face! And he tried to kill your friend!"

"I... " says Sarah, unable to make any decisions. What IS going on here? A sick joke? Madness? The whole truth and nothing but the truth?

"I'm calling the police!" says Sarah's mother.

"They won't be able to help! Trust me!" shouts Jackie. Angelus uses her moment of distraction to wriggle his way from her armlock, then retaliates, and does so much more quickly than Jackie expects. He connects - hard - to her chin, causing her to stumble backwards. A wipe with her hand reveals no blood there. This pause on her part is all he needs to move in and continue the fight. He lands a second punch across her jaw, but she blocks the next attack, albeit clumsily. She realises quickly enough that Angelus is more formidable than she'd expected. He connects almost half of his blows thanks to the sheer ferocity of his attack. Hers make contact about as often.

Jackie is holding her own well enough, when she feels a thud against her side like someone has taken a Nerf baseball bat and struck her there with it. Surprised, she turns to see Sarah shifting her feet forward and back, her arms up and locked into a fighting stance, her expression grim and determined. A dead ringer for the Vampire Slayer she portrays. She has attacked Jackie with one of her tae kwon do-trained roundhouse kicks. If Jackie had been human, it would have REALLY hurt.

"Get aWAY from him," she snarls.

"Buf-- Sarah, you don't under-OOF!" says Jackie, as Angelus wastes no time seizing this opportunity. He smashes a blow across her jaw that sends her sprawling sideways. Sarah moves and lets her fall to the ground. Then Angelus is upon her with a vengeance. He leans in and pummels Jackie mercilessly, much to Sarah's growing horror. She tries to grab his arm and pull him away, but he lunges for her, too, his demonic countenance fully reflecting his murderous rage.

He pushes Sarah away again and returns his attention to Jackie - that pesky do-gooder vampire that makes him as Angel seem like a hardened criminal. She and that insufferably fussy and stuffy friend of hers, Mar-

His arm is held firmly in position from behind. He tries to shake it loose, but someone or something has a much stronger grip than he. He straightens up, then whirls around with a snarl to face...

"Of course," says Angelus. "Who else but everyone's favourite good vampire: Mara."

"You're hurting my friend," she says, her eyes blazing red. "I don't approve, Angelus."

With a roar, he lashes out at Mara, who swats away his attack with ease. Finally she gives his arm a rough shove - rough enough to push him completely away from Jackie. Mara allows herself a quick glance at her friend.

"I'll be okay," says Jackie with a cough. "Get Angelus!" Jackie, to her surprise, is then helped to her feet by Sarah herself.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," says Jackie. "!!! Your mom! She's calling the cops, right? She can't do that!"

"Why the hell not?" says Sarah. "David's gone nuts! Like he really thinks he's his own character!"

"That IS his character," says Jackie. "He-! Ah, jeez. I'm sorry, I don't have time to explain any of this. Just please believe me... the cops can't help, and Mara there is the only one who can take this guy!"

"I... can see that," says Sarah, now turning her attention to the epic battle taking place in a restaurant parking lot.

Angelus fights like just what he is - a man possessed. He fights harder and dirtier than he ever has, but nothing works against this pasty-faced, vampiric Mary Poppins. She counters every punch, deflects every kick, dodges every spinning attack. And she does so without breaking a sweat or even changing her expression. No one would know she is even angry, save for her burning red eyes. Finally, this deadly game ends abruptly when Mara disappears behind him in a flash, and Angelus finds his arms locked behind him, again. He resists with all his might, but succeeds only in nearly ripping his shoulder from its socket. Unlike her friend's grip, Mara's is not about to be broken no matter how distracted she might be. It is finally safe for Jackie to approach him.

"We need to get to a TV," she says, glancing at her watch.

"Why would we need to do that?" says Mara.

"It's ten of 9," says Jackie. "And it's Tuesday. Buffy's gonna be over in ten minutes! We have to find a TV and throw him back into the show before it ends!"

"You think THAT'S what needs to be done?" says Mara. "He'll just smash the screen in!"

"LET ME GO!!" roars Angelus, his facial features shifting between human and demon uncontrollably.

"What did you think you were trying to do??" says Jackie to him angrily. "What sense would it make to kill the star of the show? She dies, and your show ends, and you with it! That's what you want?"

Angelus smiles. "Ohh, with all those rumours about a spinoff for me? Heyy, I was just eliminating my competition!"

"You tried to kill Ashley... and her... because of BUFFY?" says Sarah, coming towards them slowly. "I don't get it." Jackie holds out her hand in an attempt to stop her.

"Sarah, PLEASE keep back!" says Jackie. "I'm serious! This is NOT David Boreanaz!"

"Where are we going to find a television?" says Mara. "And I can't drag him through the streets like this to find one!"

"Well, there's a sports bar-" says Jackie,and then stops. "You're right. But there isn't a TV in McGinty's. Where would....?" She stops and looks around the parking lot. Her gaze falls onto a large family van. Could it...? She'd heard about the latest family "accessories" for these almost bus-sized gas guzzlers. "Follow me!" she says, then zips to the largest of them. Mara does follow, but with Angelus in front of her and still struggling mightily, she can only manage a very fast trot. Fast enough that Sarah and her companions cannot immediately catch up to them.

"What are you looking for?" says Mara as Jackie presses her face against the car's windows to peer into the dark interior. "Jackie? I can't-! Now you stop your struggling, young man! You're not staying in our world even a moment longer, is that clear?"

"D'you need help?" says Jackie.

"No, just tell me what you're looking for!"

"A lot of family cars have TVs in them these days!" says Jackie. "It's the latest 'thing' for parents with little kids."

"Yes, that's-OOF!-- lovely, now does it have one?"

"I'm still trying to-- YES! It does!" says Jackie, and races over to show Mara. "They have a TV! Now we just have to get inside and turn it on! Maybe if it's tuned to Buffy, we can send him back!"

"What are you two talking about?" asks Sarah. "Are you both as whacked as he is? Is anyone going to tell me what's going on??"

"I suspect that she won't be very keen on giving you her autograph, dear," murmurs Mara to her friend. "How DO you get us into these situations?"

"You think I brought him into our world??" says Jackie. "How would I have done that??"

"Well, it was YOUR idea to do that, wasn't it?"

"I argued against bringing him here, remember?"

"What is going on here??" shouts Sarah, who has followed them to the family van, as has Ashley. Her friend, though, keeps a greater distance from them, especially seeing 'David' struggling as he is.

Angelus manages to kick up his feet high enough to kick Jackie in the face as she and Mara are talking. This takes all by surprise, but Mara only tightens her grip so hard on him in response, that Angelus can feel the tendons in his arms stretching. He howls in pain and shows many sharp teeth to all those within sight.

"I'm okay!" says Jackie, checking her face for blood and finding none.

Mara leans close to his ear. "She had BETTER be, for your sake," she growls.

"What does my show being on have to do with any of this?" asks Sarah.

"Everything," says Jackie. "Mare, any ideas on how to get the car open without tripping the alarm?"

"Just give me a moment," she says quietly, and closes her eyes. Angelus does not struggle much at this point. He seems to have learned a lesson - most likely a brief one - about fighting too hard to escape.

From behind them, the rapid footsteps of Sarah's mother, having completed her mission, approach the scene. Jackie looks up and sighs in frustration. The manager (her boss) and two busboys accompany her.

"We kind of need to hurry, Mare..." she says through gritted teeth. Sarah and Ashley have already raced off to join them. The group still has some distance to cover before reaching them. In the dim light, and with Mara's back to them, it may not be obvious that she also has a man in an armlock.

"Mare..." says Jackie, and suddenly, the hatchback door at the rear of the van clicks, and then slowly rises until fully open. The tiny television set that Jackie had spied hangs at the front of the vehicle just above the rear-view mirror.

Mara opens her eyes, then tries to climb into the van while still holding tight onto Angelus. She moves forward, and then is unable to keep going. Something... prevents this.

"Oh, damn!" she says. "A car is private property!"

"Oh, shit, you're right!" says Jackie. "We have to be invited in!"

"Ahhhh, ain't that a shame," says Angelus. "Do you want me to go inside and look for the owners? I'm sure they'd be happy to let you finish your work."

"Shut up, you-!" says Jackie, and begins to panic as the others are almost upon them. "Shit! Mare, think you can 'will' the TV on? Channel 5!"

At the front of the van, another click is accompanied by a flash of light, and rapidly changing images as Mara does indeed, 'will' the television on and tunes it to the proper channel.

"Hey!" calls a male voice from the group. Jackie's boss. "What are you two doing?"

"Ahhh, Mare...."

Without a word Mara turns to face the group, who have just reached this very odd scene. Doing so brings Angelus around in front, who has successfully restored his face to human form. Now he appears to be an actor being assaulted by a rabid fan.

"Whoa, it's the dude who plays Angel!" says one of the busboys.

"Dan," says Jackie to the manager, "I swear to you, this is NOT what it looks like."

"I don't know WHAT the hell this looks like," says Dan. "Ma'am, you better let him go NOW."

A voice spoken much higher in pitch than any human being could possibly hear sounds in Jackie's ears. It is Mara's. Hypersonic speech. "We have no choice," she says. "We have to make them forget. You take half; I'll take the other."

Angelus winces a little as she speaks, but it is not clear if it is because he actually heard the voice, or if he is still in pain.

"Um... okay," says Jackie uneasily. The two vampires concentrate, and for a moment all looking their way see two pairs of blazing red eyes, and then nothing else. In reality, Jackie is able to "charm" two of them, and Mara the remaining four.

"Go back to the restaurant," says Mara after all have been sufficiently brought under their influence. "Nothing has happened tonight. All is well. Go back to the restaurant."

"Back...

"...is well."

"Restaurant..."

"Back..."

They turn and move as one, slowly making their way back to the restaurant as told, forgetting what they have seen more and more with each step. Jackie, meanwhile, has already thought to clamp her hand tight over Angelus' mouth, in case he thinks to shock them from their collective trance with screams or other loud noises.

"Don't lose your hold on them, hon," says Mara, abruptly turning back to the business at hand. She may not be able to enter the car under her own power, but then, that's the key, isn't it? Inside, the television continues to show the remaining minutes of Jackie's favourite show.

"Hey, it's a Spike and Dru scene!" says Jackie. "But how are we gonna-?"

"Shhh!"

Mara finally lets go of Angelus, who immediately tries to bolt, but she grabs him again by the arm, and Jackie rushes up from behind to hold his waist.

"Hold him!" says Mara. "Hold him tight, and then on my mark, toss him right at the television!"

"You're not serious-?"

"I said hold him!" says Mara. "Ready? One... Two...!"

"I'LL KILL YOU BOTH FOR THIS!" shouts Angelus. "THE RIVERS OF BOTH OUR WORLDS WILL RUN RED, AND THE SKIES WILL-"

"Oh, DO shut up!" says Mara, giving him a small kick in the back of his leg. It is enough to buckle his knee somewhat. "NOW, Jackie!"

With a mighty heave, the two vampires lift up Angelus, swing him back once, then hurl him forward in unison. There is a flash of light as Angelus reaches the "barrier" at the van's rear that would normally prevent any vampire from entering uninvited. A vampire entering under its own power, however. Jackie must look away from the glare, but Mara keeps all of her attention on the scene. For a moment, gravity seems to gain the upper hand as Angelus appears that he will fall short of their mark. Then the laws of physics, and reality itself, are grabbed and stretched and twisted hard. Angelus hovers in midair for just a moment before the television screen begins to glow brighter, and then Angelus himself is pulled towards it, his body thinning and stretching enough to fit into a 9" screen. Jackie sees only the final second, but Mara has not flinched from any of it.

*  *  *

In Sunnydale, the musings of two love-sick vampires are interrupted as a hole literally opens in the air, and Angelus comes sailing through it. He flies past Spike and Dru, who watch wordlessly as he rolls along the ground for a few feet before ending in a prone position.

"Oh, is that where you've been lately?" asks Spike. He actually hasn't the faintest idea where Angelus has been, but then, Angelus need not know that.

Angelus only groans for a moment. Then, slowly, he lifts his head, and rolls to his side to stare at them in silence.

"Imp got your tongue, then, old friend?" asks Spike. Dru simply strokes at Spike's cheek. No nonsensical ravings from her this night.

Angelus starts to get up, and then flinches and grits his teeth in pain. His eyes flash a red-orange for a moment, and then return to normal. He looks around the room now, his eyes wide in subsiding pain and... fear? He looks at Spike and Dru, then leaps to his feet quickly.

"Spike...! Dru...!" he says. Angelus then looks feverishly about the room as though searching for an escape route.

"Oh, enough theatrics, old man," says Spike. "What ARE you on about?"

"Where's Buffy?"

"Her? You tell me," says Spike. "You're the one who's stalking her."

"Stalking her?" says Angelus. "You'd like to think that, wouldn't you, Spike? I don't know how you brought me here, but don't even think about trying to keep me here."

"Uh.. right," says Spike, throwing Dru a quick glance. "Go get some bloody groceries, for all I care. Catch you at dawn, then?"

"Not a chance," says Angelus, and leaves. To his surprise, no one moves to stop him, which suits him just fine. His only thought is to find Buffy. To reassure himself that she's still safe, and still there for him.

*  *  *

Giles brings Jenny some hot tea to help her recover from the ordeal. In the library, the others are there, holding various "ingredients" of the curse that Jenny has just cast upon Angelus.

"You should get some rest now," he says. "Er... I'd be willing to take you home, if you wish."

"You'd be... willing to take me home?" asks Jenny.

"That is, I-I'd be happy to," says Giles.

"Do you think it worked, then?" asks Willow. "Do you think Angel's been cured again? Or is that cursed?"

"We'll know soon enough, I suppose," says a grim-faced Buffy. Giles drapes a coat around Jenny's shoulders and begins leading her away. Jenny hunches over her drink and leans into Giles as they walk.

"Hey, Miss Callender," calls Buffy after her. She and Giles stop.

"Yes?"

"...Thanks."

*  *  *

"Ohhhh," says Jackie. "That was...! Oh, MAN, what an ending! Mare, how can you NOT like this show?"

"I couldn't say, hon," says Mara, pulling the van's hatchback door down to shut it. "Perhaps its emphasis on demons, and darkness, evil, and perhaps its tendency to intrude - quite literally - into our own world?"

"Okay, I'm starting to not like that part of it, either," says Jackie as the two of them begin strolling through the parking lot. Mara gives her a look. "Okay, I DON'T like that part of it. But you're missing the whole point of the show. It's classic good vs. evil. It's a metaphor for high school life. You know, the 'personal demons' of the typical teen becomes a REAL demon here. And there are vampires in it! Funny ones, too!"

"Yes, well, I hope you can forgive me if I don't find Mr. Angelus to be very amusing."

"Now I just said, I don't like him coming here any more than you do," says Jackie. "But... oh-ho..." she says suddenly, and stops in her tracks. At the other end of the parking lot are coming Sarah Michelle Gellar, her mother, and her friend Ashley.

"Oh, shit! Do you think they remember?" whispers Jackie.

"I don't know," whispers Mara. "It's not easy holding on to that many people."

"Guess we're gonna find out, huh?"

"It looks like it."

They continue walking, and Sarah's group keeps on as well, until both groups pass each other with little more than casual "hellos" exchanged between them. Then Jackie stops and turns.

"Um! Ms. Gellar?" she calls after them. Sarah and her companions stop.

"Yes?" she asks, but has a very good idea why her name has been called suddenly. Jackie approaches her humbly, fishing around in her pockets for something to write on. Unfortunately, she had removed her apron, which has her order pads, before coming aside to Sarah's rescue.

"I'm sorry to bug you," says Jackie. "I was your server tonight, and it's not cool to bug celebrities, but... would it be okay if I got your autograph?"

"Oh... sure, no problem," says Sarah.

"As soon as I find something for you to put it on?" says Jackie in increasing frustration. A small yellow pad is suddenly thrust into her face. Mara has produced a Post-it note pad for her to use. Jackie grabs it immediately and utters a quick thank you before presenting it to Sarah, who signs it with very practiced ease. Jackie thanks her with great enthusiasm and pumps her hand for a few seconds before letting her favourite actress depart the scene for good.

Afterwards Jackie examines the signature as thought not quite believing what she has.

"Is this the best thing in the world?" she asks excitedly.

"Well, I'm glad that you got what you wanted, dear," says Mara. "As for me, it IS safe for me to get back home, do you think?"

"Huh? Oh, oh! Yeah, I'm sure it is!" says Jackie. "I mean, we saw that everyone's back in Sunnydale. And Angel's cured, too! No more evil dude! Cool, huh?"

"Yes..." says Mara. "Cool."

"Oh, before you go," says Jackie. "First, thank you a thousand times over for saving my butt back there. Not to mention Sarah's! And she won't even remember it! Damn!"

"As opposed to the alternative?" says Mara. "That she DOES remember? And you're very welcome, hon. I'm just grateful that you caught me at home. This is normally a teaching night for me."

"Yeah, that WAS lucky, then," says Jackie. "So... when do I get a chance to save YOUR butt? I owe you forever for that."

"You know that you owe me nothing," says Mara. "If it's within my power to help, I'll do it."

"You should be a superhero," says Jackie. "You and me need to patrol the streets from now on and fight crime."

"Oh, PLEASE, girl," says Mara. "And people insist that televsion isn't rotting their minds."

"It is NOT rotting my mind!" says Jackie. "And besides, I got that idea from comic books."

"I rest my case."

"Low blow! Foul! No points!"

"Good NIGHT, Jackie!"

Jackie smiles at her friend. Then she leans forward and wraps Mara in a bear hug. They stand like this for several seconds before separating.

"Thanks," says Jackie. "I DO owe you. Seriously. I don't care if you say I don't."

Mara kisses the top of her head, then walks away, giving her a little wave first. Jackie then watches her zip the rest of the way across the lot, where Mara suddenly leaps up, her body shifting and contorting, until finally a large black bat has taken her place. If any nearby Angelinos have seen this departure, no one passing by gives any indication of this.

A moment later, Jackie hears a car approaching from behind. She steps aside to let it pass by. Inside she sees Sarah's mother at the wheel, "chaffeuring" her daughter and daughter's friend, who sit in the backseat and appear to be laughing at some shared joke.

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